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Were Me Out

By:Robyn Peterman

"I think you might be protesting a little too much," I said, biting down on my bottom lip so I didn't grin. He was every kind of ridiculous and I wanted to kick my own ass for being charmed by him.

"That didn't sway you?" Junior asked in all seriousness.

"Umm, no."

"Well shee-ot, my poor nuts are gonna shrivel up and fall off."

"Is that possible?" Duke asked, horrified as he paled considerably.

"Damn straight it's possible," Junior went on, checking in to see if I felt sorry for him yet.

I didn't.

"Pretty sure my man meat is next," he added, to a chorus of terrified gasps from his halfwit deputies.

"You did not just say man meat," I choked out, trying not to laugh.

"Crap," Junior shouted, completely flustered and knocking stacks of paperwork from his desk to the floor. "I meant rod, not meat. Better?"

His hopeful smile was adorable, but this was a losing game and I needed to opt out soon. I wanted him so badly I couldn't see straight-horrifying language and all.

"No, absolutely not," I replied with an enormous eye roll as I began to tidy up the mess he'd just made-again.

When Junior got panicked, office supplies went flying.

"Tallywhacker?" Bubba suggested.


"Love muscle?" Duke put forth, not wanting to be left out.


"Enough," Junior snapped and helped me repair the chaos he'd created. "You two strippin' turd knockers are not allowed to talk to my girl like that. I'm the only one that can say those words around her. Clear?"

"Yessir," Bubba said respectfully. "My bad. No more wiener talk."

"Good. Get in the cell and do some deep thinking about showing your privates to the town during lunchtime. Mrs. McDonald damn near had a heart attack and that's virtually impossible for an Octopus Shifter. She's got three dang hearts."

"We're sorry," Bubba muttered as he dragged his feet over to the cell and made himself comfortable on the cot. "You gonna lock it?"

Junior considered for a brief second and then shook his head. "Nah, but you two are in time out until I get back. You hear?"

"Yessir," Duke grumbled, shoving Bubba over and slumping down next to him. "We did raise three hundred and six dollars for the new swing set at the park."

Junior's head dropped to his chest and he blew out a long slow breath. "Fine. Get out of the cell. You boys done good, but you did it in a dumbass way. You follow?"

"Uhhh … " Bubba replied, scratching his head in confusion.

Duke raised his hand politely and waited his turn.

"Is this gonna make any sense?" Junior asked.

"Don't know," Duke replied truthfully.

"Go for it," Junior said.

"I think you're sayin' that it would be better to remove our clothes in public after lunch instead of during lunch. Meal times and peckers are not a good match."

I slapped my hand over my mouth, but a small giggle escaped. Working around men all the time had screwed with my ladylike sensibilities. Of course having six brothers didn't help either.

"No. That is not what I'm sayin'," Junior snapped and stared hard at the ceiling for inspiration or words simple enough that the boys would understand. "Your Johnson does not leave your pants in crowds. Ever. If it does, it will be removed."

"Harsh," Bubba grumbled. "What if nature calls?"

"You ever heard of a bathroom?" Junior asked, grabbing his wallet, phone and gun as he gently pushed me out the door.

Thankfully we escaped before we could get into a debate about the usefulness of urinals versus trees and fire hydrants.

"We really going to the Piggly Wiggly?" Junior asked with a grin.

"Yes we are," I answered, trying to sound prim, uninterested and bored.

Not possible. His scent alone made my head whirl. There was nothing even remotely boring about Junior, aka Jacob only to his mother, Wilson.

"Can I hold your hand?"


"Can I stare at your ass?"

I paused for a moment and weighed all the options. He was going to keep asking for things until I agreed to something. I worked hard on my ass. If he wanted to appreciate it, so be it.


"Hot damn," he shouted. "Can I touch it?"

Expelling a sigh that sounded like an angry snake hiss, I turned on the big sexy lug. Junior jumped back and did his best to swallow his delighted grin. He failed.

"No you cannot touch it," I snapped, lying through my teeth as I marched into the Piggly Wiggly with my head held high. I wanted him to throw me over his broad shoulders, carry me away to a cave and do me until I was cross eyed. That, however, would be a monumental mistake. "Right now my ass is private property. You touch it, you lose your hand."

"Damn that's hot," he said loud enough for the entire grocery to overhear. "You gonna remove my lips if I kiss it?"

I felt the heat crawl up my neck as well meaning neighbors and friends attempted to unsuccessfully hide their smiles. Deciding the best way to deal with Junior was to ignore him, I did just that.

However, Junior was a difficult person to ignore.

Tremendously difficult.

Chapter Two

The Piggly Wiggly was packed and I spotted the clusterhump coming before it happened. My fangs dropped and the need to kill consumed me, but instead of acting on my baser instincts, I slipped behind a huge pyramid display of canned baked beans and tried to calm down.

I growled menacingly under my breath as I watched female Wolf after female Wolf make a play for Junior-all mini skirts, boobs and lip gloss. And why wouldn't they? He was the Alpha, he was gorgeous and he wasn't mated. He had the rep of being a player and all the gals wanted a piece of him.

Unfortunately, I did too. The opportunity of a naked Junior on a platter was mine for the taking. However, Tigers didn't change their stripes and Wolves with over active peckers didn't either.

I knew without a doubt if I partook in the main course he'd ruin me for all other men. I had more pride than becoming